About

Big Apple Chapel is a New Testament based church in New York City, modeled after the pattern of the early church, with a strong emphasis on following Christ as a community of His disciples.

Services
  • Sunday - 10:30 am
  • 520 8th Ave, 16th floor
    New York, NY
  • phone: +1 (973) 837-1041
 

Sermons

BAC Sermons

Perception and Performance 3: Emotions A

2004-04-25 Proverbs 29:11

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Fools Vent - Wise Prevent Pr 29:11  A fool vents all his feelings, But a wise man holds them back.

I. Our Habits & Values create Expectations, influencing our Perceptions & Emotions, determining our Performance.

Experiences Values Expectations Filter Perceptions Emotions Performance Feedback

II. Emotions can be positive/helpful or negative/hurtful; denied, avoided, or used and mastered

Pr 29:11 Vent = cause wind/spirit/disposition to go out (Hiphil -causative);   Holds = soothe or still back (Piel -intentional/intensive)

No one makes us feel; we choose to create feelings, acc our rules; by what we focus on, meaning we attach, represent = re present

III. TEN categories/types of emotions and their message

(from Tony Robbins Lessons In Mastery)

Steps (Robbins): 1. Identify emotion & signal; 2. Listen to message about what needs to change (perception/rules or procedure);

3. Get curious about what it’s offering you how can benefit; need to change way acting, feeling, communicating;

4.Reprogram by rehearsing how to use as tool of empowerment; 5. Take constant and repeated action to improve and change life

1. Uncomfortable: low intensity: boredom, impatient, uneasy, distressed, embarrassed

Message: need to change, clarify what you want, take action until you get it. Isa 26:3  You will keep him in perfect peace, Whose mind

is stayed on You, Because he trusts in You. 4  Trust in the LORD forever, For in YAH, the LORD, is everlasting strength.

2. Fear: concern, apprehension, worry, anxiety, scared, frightened, terrified (don’t deny or surrender to) 1Pt 5:7

Message: need to prepare self to deal with or avoid negative consequences (appropriate versus fixation) Isa 41:10  Fear not, for I am with you; Be not dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, Yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.’

3. Hurt: loss (intimacy, trust) (is there really a loss? Maybe need to change expectation or way of communicating) 

Message: expectation not met Php 4:19  And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus.

4. Anger: irritated, livid, resentful, furious, rage - outgrowth of hurt {build-up} (how you deal will result in closeness or distance)

Message: important rule or standard has been violated (clarify or compromise {personal stds}) Eph 4:31  Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. Eph 4:26 do not sin": do not let the sun go down on your wrath,

5. Frustration: held back, hindered in pursuit of something Ps 138:8  The LORD will perfect that which concerns me

Message: change approach to achieving goal (flexible) Jas 1:4 But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing. Ps 18:32  It is God who arms me with strength, And makes my way perfect.

6. Disappointment: sad or defeated, something you expect didn’t work out well Php 4:4 Rejoice in the Lord always. Again I say, rejoice!

Message: outcome won’t happen unless you change expectation to more appropriate outcome in light of reality

7. Guilt: regret  (don’t deny it , nor surrender - it will intensify into inadequacy, inferiority)

Message: you violated the standard and must do something immediately to ensure you won’t do it again in the future (make right)

1Jn 1:9  If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

8. Inadequacy: less than or unworthy (is criteria appropriate or do I need to change procedure) 2Tim 3:16-17 adequate/perfect/equipped

Message: need to do something to get better in this area right away Php 4:13  I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

9. Overloaded: overwhelmed, hopeless, depressed, more than you can deal with (too much in too short a period of time) Mt 26:38

Message: revaluate what’s most important (necessity or desire), prioritize, take action on first one, back in control! 2Co 9:8  God is able to make all grace abound toward you, that you, always having all sufficiency in all things, may have an abundance for every good work.

10. Lonely: separation     Ps 42:11  Why are you cast down, O my soul? And why are you disquieted within me? Hope in God; For I shall yet praise Him, The help of my countenance and my God.

Message: need to connect with another    2Tim 4:16 At my first defense no one stood with me, but all forsook me. May it not be charged against them.17  But the Lord stood with me and strengthened me,

Questions for Reflection/Discussion/Response:

1. What situation tends to evoke a strong negative emotional response? What are your expectations in that situation? What values are revealed?

2. How does complete faithful submission to the Lordship of Christ “solve” emotional problems or keep them from arising?

3.  Is it easier to change our values or reprogram our robot (subconscious habit) responses? How do you act your way into a feeling?

4. What emotion would you most like to master? Why? What advantages would you experience? What would you have to change?

5. ACTION STEP: note the times and expectations that evoke a feeling you want to master. Analyze, Adjust (values/expectation), Act.

 

 

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