Perception & Performance 13 Avoid the Emotional Death Spiral Part 2
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Perception Performance 13b Escape the Emotional Death Spiral
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B. Mentally, focusing on Truth, track record, an accurate perception of past/present/future helps us put things into perspective. Failure ?Fatal
The untrained mind keeps up a running commentary, labeling everything, judging everything. Best to ignore that commentary. Don’t argue or resist, just ignore. Deprived of attention and interest, this voice gets quieter and quieter and eventually just shuts up. -Socrates
Renewed mind Rm 12:1 yield as a living sacrifice 2 transformed by the renewing of your mind Phil 4:8 think on these things
2Cor 2:10 forgive 11 lest Satan should take advantage/outwit of us; for we are not ignorant of his devices/schemes
Take heed (Acts 20:28; 1Cor 3:10) Journal; feelings and logic - then examine and test for truth, and balance; seek counsel Pr 12:15; 19:20
Stoics-Disciplines of Perception seeing accurately dispassionately (wind), expecting adversity; Action ?+objective 5,4,3,2,1; Will endurance
“I am also aware that there is the real me and the ideal me. Ideal me is what I identify is the right way to behave/ think. Real me is where I really am. First step to regaining self-control is internal examination to see what’s there and why. I get very basic - I feel bad because of x, y, z. To a Feeler, the emotions are aligned with the person’s subjective values, so when they experience an emotion, it resonates within as / seems like truth, because it is an expression of the authentic self. It is a subjective truth, which should be recognized as such, and examined to see if it lines up with the Word/the ideal.”
“Resolution (real-ideal me) requires understanding where I stand currently on something / how I'm perceiving a situation, and then understanding God’s perspective on it. Once I understand the gap between the two, I align myself under God’s perspective (seek forgiveness, change perspective, start operating under the new standard) because I know my way is not best, and then the emotions lose their power over me. If I skip these steps, i.e. tell myself I shouldn’t feel a certain way, or commit to acting a new way without doing the gap analysis, I will continue to struggle with my emotions. Emotions are a real-time indicator of my values/thinking. As I continue to refine my filters, I gain greater control over my emotions and grow in self-control (results in less death spirals). I can’t see any other way to do this.
C. Spiritually by the HS/His Word we put to death the flesh (desire for the temporal) and wisely pursue the Truth acc to God's revealed will
“Spiritual necessities: God's perspective; Prayer; Fellowship; Biblical view of conflict; Discern God's voice/the Spirit from satan's (conviction vs accusation); Ps 84:11 perspective; 2Tim 1:7 promise that God has given us a spirit of power, love and sound-mindedness
1Pt 5:5 be submissive to one another, and be clothed with humility, for “God resists the proud,But gives grace to the humble.” Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time,7 casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you. 8 Be sober/sound-minded, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion seeking whom he may devour. 9 Resist him steadfast in the faith...10 God of all grace, called us to His eternal glory by Christ Jesus, after you have suffered a while...
Ps 130:1 Out of the depths I have cried to You, O LORD; 2 Lord, hear my voice! 4 there is forgiveness with You, that You may be feared. 5 I wait for YHWH, my soul waits, and in His word I do hope 7...hope in YHWH for with Him is hesed and abundant redemption
1Jn 1:9 If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
“The self-examination goes like this: I don’t pre-judge myself - I consider every emotion legitimate and probe until I get to the underlying value. I think lack of pre-judgment is an important pre-requisite. Prayer is a very powerful tool to control the emotions. However, it’s never automatic and the mind is almost always directed to try other things first. Nothing is more powerful than coming before God honestly and pouring out every single one of my feelings - I can let them go more easily as I’m also reminded of my position before God, and then I’m more open to receiving direction from God. That takes faith that God can do something about it and cares to hear me out and help me figure out what’s wrong.
Pre-determining my objectives and preparing for a situation by praying before an event/situation can make a HUGE difference. If I’ve considered a circumstance with God, sought His help, thot about what His objectives would be for me instead of my own, I am better able to regain self-control when I unexpectedly feel threatened. The animal brain still tries to take over, but if I have already considered it in prayer (where it gets more solidified in my thinking & values) then I can choose to turn off the adrenaline once I get a prompting about something I’ve prayed about. If I act in a manner that I know God’s pleased with (which requires my rational brain), I feel quietly and calmly good about myself and can have peace (which comes when I’ve chosen the right path) even if circumstances are messy and people around me are displeased. I’m not telling myself “I’m ok” - I actually know I’m ok or doing well.
D. Emotionally unmoved by unsanctified fears/desires/values but eagerly motivated by the heart and will of God to embrace His path
“A mature Feeler should feel emotionally in control (therefore emotionally neutral) most days. Downward spirals should be an anomaly. A mature Feeler has probably experienced the regret of being emotionally out of control - and after a certain point, the negative consequences should serve as a deterrent.”
8k orgs:“Managing emotions is essentially what emotional intelligence is about. It requires self-awareness, self-management, social awareness and relationship management. This post is all about beckoning you to commit yourself to both teach and assess the number one soft-skill we must cultivate in students: to learn how to manage their emotions. Need to: Learn to actively listen; empathize; recognize and value unique individuals; welcome, not shun, diverse perspectives; withhold judgment until a person is finished talking